Well, the Bengals managed to ruin Dave Lapham’s big day. Not that he’d say that, of course. I drove to Cincinnati last weekend for my annual-ish trip to Paycor Stadium to speak with Mr. Bengal before he was inducted into the team’s Ring of Honor and to see the Joe Flacco Machine in action. Flacco didn’t disappoint, rolling up 38 points and 398 yards of offense.
The Bengals defense, however, cratered in a rock-bottom performance, resulting in a loss to the previously winless and inept Jets 39-38. Cincinnati blew two 14-point leads and a 15-point lead in the process and fell to 3-5 on the season. It was the 2021 Mike White Game all over again, as I feared last week. That year, the Bengals rebounded to make the Super Bowl. Anyone want to bet that history repeats?
For a couple of hours, all went according to plan. On a glorious fall afternoon, Lapham’s No. 62 went onto the stadium facade, immortalized along with cornerback Lemar Parrish, a player the Bengals desperately needed to suit up on Sunday. Cincinnati roared out to a big lead, though the Jets were moving the ball behind Justin Fields, benched a week ago and playing only due to a knee injury to backup Tyrod Taylor. Trey Hendrickson, recipient of a “He’s baaaaaack” from the PA announcer in pre-game introductions, got nailed on a blindside hit late in the half, limped off, fired his helmet to the ground, and was not seen again. Neither was any semblance of defense from the rest of the unit.
Still, Cincinnati led 24-13 at halftime, and all seemed right with the world. Lap hopped into a golf cart with a spring in his step that brought everyone back to his glory days as a pulling guard and was whisked to the field. He waved his ceremonial coat with fervor as the crowd roared one more time for the man who has either played in or broadcast Bengals games for almost all of the last 50 years.
“The fans are the biggest part of this job, and I really do it for them,” Lapham told me before the game. “My main mission every day is to never mislead them—that would be the biggest mistake in the world.”
Several hours later, those same fans would boo the Bengals off the field. Nothing misleading about that.
“Hopefully there is some excitement,” Lap told me. “That would cap a memorable, beautiful day.” Excitement, there was plenty of: 77 points, 900 total yards, a Flacco tush push, a gorgeous bomb to Tee Higgins, and excellent performances by the O-line and backs Chase Brown and Samaje Perine. Cincinnati ran the ball for 181 yards, had no turnovers, and still managed to lose.
Fundamentally, the game was identical to the one two weeks ago, when Flacco got the ball on the last possession and passed Cincinnati downfield for the winning field goal after a late defensive collapse. On Sunday, alas, the one time all game the run failed was a surprise second-and-10 handoff near midfield with time running down. It was stuffed for no gain, putting Cincinnati behind the eight-ball in its desperate attempt to pull off another last-second victory. Hard to second-guess the call, really, given how the team was running it down the Jets throat. But when plays don’t work, the coaches and players get heat. That’s football.
Speaking of heat, defensive coordinator Al Golden is certainly feeling it, as is de facto GM Duke Tobin. The full panoply of errors was again on display against the Jets: missed tackles, no physicality, blown communication, guys running themselves out of plays or failing to disengage from blocks, and enemy skill players running into huge meadows of open space.
As I warned many times after he was hired, Golden has never called plays in the NFL. That isn’t an automatic negative, but right now he’s getting worked by opposing play-callers. It was apparent that the Jets were running variations of concepts the Bengals mostly stopped in the first half, with no counter-adjustment from Golden. Watching from the press box, you could see pre-snap formations that almost guaranteed a picked defender or an unset edge. And it played out in seeming slow motion, as most car wrecks do.
Once more, all it took in an excruciating fourth quarter was one stop to win the game, but Golden’s embattled crew didn’t come close to getting it. Instead, the Jets scored 23 points, or six more than they had over the previous two games combined. Over in Indianapolis, Lou Anarumo is cackling and popping a 40-ounce.
Fortunately, the Bengals held a players-only defensive meeting this week. That should solve everything. If not, check the status of the ping-pong tables.
All eyes continue to fall on the young and cheap defenders drafted over the past three years. With only an exception or two, none have made an impact. If the coaching can’t bring it out of them, clearly there is an issue with the players themselves, right? They’re the ones who ultimately have to make this happen. (See team meeting above.)
But I reject the idea that they’re simply all poor picks who “aren’t talented” or “can’t play.” Tobin didn’t go out on a huge limb to select many of these guys. Shemar Stewart, Myles Murphy, and Dax Hill were consensus first-round picks. If Cincy/Tobin didn’t take them, someone right behind them would have, for better or worse.
Clearly, though, they aren’t producing to their draft status. Why? As usual, there is no single answer. One large reason is that many are asked (or assumed) to be able to do things they cannot.
For example, defensive tackle Kris Jenkins has actually been a solid run defender thus far, as his collegiate career would indicate. But on a line devoid of interior pass rushers, he’s asked to pressure the quarterback and is (unsurprisingly) not capable of it. Safety Jordan Battle is a solid diagnostician and hard hitter, but he’s being asked to cover in space and blitz more than he is comfortable with, and it affects his entire game. Linebacker is a hard position to learn and play well as a rookie, and both Demetrious Knight and Barrett Carter are getting worked as they learn. And the depth behind these dubious starters is non-existent, so it’s hardly a surprise they look exhausted in the final quarter (where they’ve surrendered 54 points over the last three games).
If you want to replace Tobin, I’m with you. But who is taking this job under the current circumstances? You need to think about him less as a traditional player personnel man and more like a commissioner. Roger Goodell is essentially a front for the owners, taking all heat and complaints to his office while allowing his 32 bosses to make ungodly amounts of money in the shadows. Tobin is similarly valued by the Browns/Blackburns, who have their incompetent hands all over roster construction, personnel evaluations, and salary administration while letting Duke serve as the public face for it all.
Would any potential GM worth his or her salt want to operate under these conditions and constraints? Sure, someone would take the job, and they’d probably manage the same ups and downs in draft and free agency as Sir Duke. But anyone who could really make a difference won’t come close to Cincinnati because the system is set up to work against an independent front office operator.
Certainly, the reliance on coaches to be a key part of the scouting operation has hit a brick wall. It seems like a good idea in theory: You want your football ops and personnel departments on the same page. But coaches always believe they can take the talented guy who may not have shown production equivalent to his traits and bring out his best. That’s a fundamental part of being a coach, especially ones who are practicing at the highest level.
Over the last decade or so, however, that hasn’t happened, leaving the Bengals with a raft of players with nice measureables but not much in the way of football smarts, hunger, or capacity to improve. The high value placed on being a good dude from a big school is proving dubious as well.
The crushing part is that with Flacco at the helm the offense has been humming, to the tune of 89 points over the last 10 quarters. Considering where it was not three weeks ago—stuck in molasses, if not in reverse—that’s an astonishing development, and credit is due Zac Taylor and Dan Pitcher, not to mention Ageless Joe. Frankly, it’s hard to imagine Joe Burrow performing much better.
So, of course, the single time Flacco was sacked on Sunday—on a late third down dropback—he appears to have injured his ancient body. He reportedly has an AC joint sprain that leaves him questionable this week and probably beyond. That puts Sunday’s home game against Chicago in jeopardy, or even more so than before. The Bears managed to lose to Snoop Huntley and the beat-up Ravens last week, a swing that combined with Pittsburgh’s loss makes Baltimore odds-on favorites in the AFC North once more and makes Cincinnati’s loss to the Jets that much more painful to absorb.
But with a defense that’s somehow worse than last season and setting futility records all over the place, lapping the field in missed tackles and unable to rush the passer to save its life, there is no real reason to check the standings and hope. Mike Zimmer isn’t walking through that door.
The last thing Dave Lapham said to me before the Bengals radio broadcast began was a reflection on his incredibly charmed life. “If it’s a dream,” he said, “I don’t want to wake up, that’s for sure.”
The Bengals defense is a nightmare, unfortunately, and there are no signs of waking up from it.
Robert Weintraub heads up Bengals coverage for Cincinnati Magazine and has written for The New York Times, Grantland, Slate, and Deadspin. He guests on Mo Egger’s radio show every Thursday in the 4 p.m. hour. Follow him on X at @robwein.
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