Let’s talk about the four stages of homeownership. They’re not quite as well-known as the five stages of grief, though buying and owning a house can involve denial, anger, and bargaining for many people. Here are my home stages: Get in, expand, contract, get out. I’m on the precipice of stage three.
We bought a starter home in our first year of marriage for $110,000. It was a perfect introduction to the joys and tribulations of owning a house: filling it with stuff and memories, turning a small bedroom into a nursery, replacing the back deck and building a retaining wall. When my wife was pregnant with our second child, we bought a bigger house and took on that accompanying next-level worry: Can we could really afford the mortgage and property taxes? Is the school system right for us? How will we navigate the need for contractors and specialists to fix problems instead of doing repairs ourselves?
And now, with both kids off on their own, we see stage three on the horizon: downsizing. We haven’t decided yet if we’ll contract into a smaller house/condo or if we’ll skip straight to stage four and get out entirely. I’ve been getting served a ton of mobile home and van life ads after I googled “Winnebago.” To be determined.
No homeowner navigates the stages the same way as anyone else. Some, like my mom, stick in stage two and never move out of the five-bedroom family home even though they should have downsized and made life easier on themselves. Some Boomers, like me so far, cling to their 2.5 percent mortgages and kick stages three and four down the lane.
The reality is that stage four is coming for all of us one day, whether it’s by choice, by necessity, or by death. What’s up for debate is whether stage one is within reach for younger generations in 2025. This month’s home-buying section offers really smart strategies and tips for navigating the complicated, expensive process of buying and selling houses—while keeping your grief to a minimum. Happy house hunting, no matter what stage you’re in!
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